Opinion & Analysis

Four golfers to avoid at the driving range

Published

13 years ago

Jul 3, 2013

In a previous article, I highlighted the four golfers to avoid when playing a round of golf.

The list provided a basis to enhance the enjoyment of your weekly game, and keep you from quitting forever. However, as people with lives outside of golf, we know it isn’t realistic to get in 18 holes as much as we’d hope. Sometimes, we don’t even have time for a quick nine holes before sunset.

As golf addicts with an itch to swing the club, this leaves us with only one option: the public golf range. You know, the double-decker golf range with 180 stalls; equipped with golf mats, rubber tees, a mini-golf course, a trivial pro shop that only sells Wilson golf gloves and Pink Lady golf balls, a batting cage, and yellow, limited-flight Srixon range balls. Everyone has a local public range that they have resorted to, either in the off-season, or just to hit a small bucket after work.

This installment of “players to avoid,” features golfers at the local public range. These people will no doubt have a negative effect on your off-season/after-work golfing experience.

The Jack Byrnes, a.k.a. “The Over Bearing Father/Husband”

We all know him. He’s the guy that stands behind his son/daughter/wife and tells them what to do. The advice he’s giving is not only fundamentally flawed, but it’s articulated in the most condescending way possible.

Nothing is better than when he goes to show the “secret move,” and duffs the demonstration shot. The worst part is that he thinks he’s doing his loved one’s a favor by teaching them the game. Unfortunately, all he’s really doing is robbing them of enjoyment, instilling poor swing habits and scarring them for life.

Phrases you’ll hear from The Overbearing Father/Husband:

“Are you stupid?”
“That’s terrible!”
“How can I fix something that bad?”
“Stop wasting my time.”

The Animal House, a.k.a “The College Kids”

This is the group of degenerates at the back end of the range in jeans and cut off T-shirts. They’re undoubtedly drinking Keystone Light’s (finishing off the 12-pack that they cracked in the parking lot), using borrowed drivers from the pro shop (which they’ll probably steal afterwards) and spend most of their time throwing golf balls at the range picker, rather than working on their swing plane.

I’m all for the growth of golf and accepting new people that want to learn the game, but disrespect is a different story. And watch your mouth — cursing isn’t cool when there are kids around.

Phrases you’ll hear from The College Kids:

“Dude.”
“Foooooooore!”
“Hold my beer.”
(Sound of a driver hitting a beer can).

The Tin Cup, a.k.a “ The Gadget Guy”

This guy provides distraction based purely off humor. He spent $700+ on new gadgets over the winter, and he’s using them all at once. He has alignment tools, swing plane aids, core building enhancements and hip-turn helpers. With all this assistance, he’s still the one in the corner of the range hitting chili peppers up Lee Janzen’s butt (Tin Cup movie reference).

Hey Romeo, tell him to put all the change in his left pocket, for everyone’s benefit.

Phrases you’ll hear from The Gadget Guy:

“I’m gonna get it soon.”
“All I need to do is learn this one move.”
“By mid-summer I’ll be scratch.”
“You’ll see.”

The Happy Gilmore, a.k.a “The Crazy Person”

There’s no other way to describe this guy — he’s a head case. He’s the golfer with two jumbo buckets in front to him, getting increasingly frustrated with each swing.

He’s audibly yelling cuss words, convincing himself he’s terrible and lining up ball after ball hoping for better results. You almost start to feel bad for him, until he throws his new Taylormade R1 driver down the range, farther than you can hit your pitching wedge (impressive).

The golf range is for game improvement and relaxation, not fits of rage and self-loathing verbal assaults. Maybe he’d be better-suited taking fastballs off his forehead in the batting cages.

Phrases you’ll hear from The Crazy Person (censored for offensive language):

“I should quit.
“I don’t enjoy playing golf.”
“Wow, I’m really bad at this.”
“My life is worthless.”

This list of golfers should leave you with a decent idea of who to avoid at the public golf range. Whether you’re going to hit a jumbo bucket to work out the kinks, or simply blowing off steam after work, this should help you keep your sanity this season. Hit ‘em long and straight, but don’t be a distraction.

Related Topics:

Up Next

Hunt: Breaking down the best players on tour by category

Don't Miss

Case #5589: The campaign for the longest driver in golf

Andrew Tursky

He played on the Hawaii Pacific University Men's Golf team and earned a Masters degree in Communications. He also played college golf at Rutgers University, where he graduated with a Bachelor of Arts in Journalism.

24 Comments

OVER THE TOP GOLF

Oct 3, 2013 at 3:30 pm

When I can take the time, I’ll go to the range, pick out a terrible hacker, show him my 5 set-up changes, then sit back and enjoy his shock at hitting straight golf shots. Wish I could meet up with Charles Barkley out there one night. I’d be driving a Bentley soon afterward.

Reply Report comment
Kristin

Jul 24, 2013 at 7:50 am

Pretty sure the overly sensitive whiners with no sense of humor who are taking offense to this and getting all worked up are likely Happy Gilmores, Animal Houses, or Jack Byrnes and you hit the tee shot a little close to their flag. Relax, friends, this article was meant to be funny. And it was. Get over yourselves. Could also be internet trolls just going around trying to stir up controversy and ruin everyone’s day.

Reply Report comment
Andy

Jul 12, 2013 at 2:30 am

This article is comedic if you get it, offensive if you let it.

Here’s food for thought for future GolfWRX rages (Marty, suggested reading):-

The better, mentally stronger golfer doesn’t get too upset when a bad shot is hit; vice versa for a lesser golfer (read Chapter 6 – Bob Rotella’s ‘Golf Is Not A Game Of Perfect’ if you disagree).

The irony of the situation is, those few who have let so petty an article upset/offend/outrage them (I say petty with respect, I thought it was quite funny), you have some work to do want if you want to improve your golf (and in turn, be a better person).

You won’t get far in life if you let petty nothings, such as thus, evoke such negativity within.

And to those right now thinking “It’s not negativity! It’s my opinion and it’s my right to share it!! Who are you to tell me what to think?!”, my message is this:

Shut up.

Reply Report comment
Zak Kozuchowski

Jul 10, 2013 at 10:16 pm

Let’s cool it, guys.

– Zak

Reply Report comment
Ronald Montesano

Jul 10, 2013 at 7:18 pm

Why would you want to avoid these guys/gals?

Reply Report comment
- Andrew Tursky
  
  Jul 10, 2013 at 8:25 pm
  
  The article is a comedic take on different people and personalities you encounter at the driving range as they pertain to characters in popular media, not to be taken offensively.
  
  Reply Report comment
  - Marty
    
    Jul 10, 2013 at 10:11 pm
    
    One problem- the article wasn’t funny. If it were, maybe you wouldn’t have people taking offense. Try harder next time?
    
    Reply Report comment
Nicholas

Jul 10, 2013 at 4:56 pm

Sounds to me like you have concentration problems, social issues, are worried about others rather than your own game, or you don’t understand the game of golf as it relates to everyone. I guess it can’t be helped.

Reply Report comment
John

Jul 10, 2013 at 2:01 pm

Yeah not a fan of this article…you started by saying public range, so you should’ve just stopped there…a public driving range is for ANYONE to go and use and enjoy however they may please. Golf is a game for everyone, all ages all personalities, and it’s articles like this that is really hurting the game with this elitist mentality. Because some people don’t practice as seriously and as often as you they need to be avoided?…if drinking is allowed, drink beers, if there aren’t kids around, yell and swear as much as you like until someone asks you (nicely) not to…seems like the guy to avoid is the guy who has problems with everyone around him at the public range because he’s such a serious golfer (must be turning pro soon)…if you don’t like the people around you, wear blinders and headphones, then rewrite this article to include yourself

Reply Report comment
- Dave
  
  Sep 20, 2013 at 10:29 pm
  
  The range is not there to be used however one pleases. There is etiquette just like on the golf course. If you’re yelling profanity and throwing clubs or drunk to the point of endangering others we don’t have to just deal with it. Why would the folks who are respectful have to be polite in how they ask another person to stop acting in such a way when the violator isn’t giving anyone else the same respect? The comment “yell and swear as much as you like until someone asks you (nicely) not to” is just plain ignorant. The problem isn’t “everyone” around us, just the jackass who’s acting a fool. The sense of entitlement to do as you please regardless of how it affects others is an issue. If you think you should be able to do whatever you want wherever you want to the problem is yours, not some elitist bunch of golf nuts.
  
  Reply Report comment
Marty

Jul 7, 2013 at 2:35 pm

Some of us can only afford the public range. Sorry if we don’t fit the bill of what real golfers should be like.

Reply Report comment
- Jonathan Chicks
  
  Jul 10, 2013 at 8:16 pm
  
  Relax bud its just a humorous article pointing out the types of people who we have all seen at the range. It has nothing to do with what one can afford. If you think one of these is you, then you should adjust how you play at the range, as it makes the experience worse for everyone else. The only bill to fit of what a real golfer is, would be to act with respect.
  
  Reply Report comment
  - Marty
    
    Jul 10, 2013 at 10:12 pm
    
    Hey, thanks BUD! I will take exactly 0% of your advice to heart!
    
    Reply Report comment
WarrePeace

Jul 4, 2013 at 3:20 pm

The one I especially like is the big buff guy in a tight polo shirt who brings his girlfriend to watch him hit balls or even better- to follow him in a golf tournament. Since I am only 5’6″ but have played competitively for many years, I love to settle in next to these guys and just flight balls at every target and then hit it 40 yrds past the big brute with the driver swinging easy and listen to them getting more and more pissed. Finally the girl will say- how come that guy can hit it farther than you?- Then the lid comes off the boiler and the guy starts swinging as hard as he can- only to yield 60 yrd slices ha ha- I love golf, the great equalizer of men. It’s even more comical in a tournament where there is trouble right and left.

Reply Report comment
- Tyler
  
  Jul 5, 2013 at 5:57 pm
  
  You do realize you just sounded like the big buff brutes that drag their girlfriends to te course, right?
  
  Reply Report comment
- brian
  
  Jul 6, 2013 at 9:11 pm
  
  so you go to the range to show off?
  
  Reply Report comment
- Dirk
  
  Jul 8, 2013 at 1:36 pm
  
  Hey Bro!
  
  Ever hear of this thing called a Napoleon complex? Might want to look into it–it could explain why you have problems connecting with others!
  
  Reply Report comment
  - ray
    
    Jul 11, 2019 at 8:14 am
    
    Spoken like a poor golfers with insecurity issues who wants the status quo.
    
    Face it, he’s better than you. Period.
    
    Ps. Look up napolean complex and understand it properly..
    
    Reply Report comment
- IgnoranceIsBliss
  
  Jul 12, 2013 at 5:30 am
  
  … and then you woke up and realised you were still 5’6″ with a 150M bunt off the tee?
  
  Reply Report comment
Carl

Jul 4, 2013 at 5:00 am

My personal favorite. “How far is it to the back flag? Only 345? Not sure that’s deep enough for me but I guess it’ll work”

Reply Report comment
Mitch

Jul 4, 2013 at 12:03 am

Was at the range the other day when the random guy next to me turned and asked me, “do you play?”……….. Literally shocked by the stupidity of that question.

Reply Report comment
- ssf
  
  Jul 5, 2013 at 12:38 am
  
  … pick up line at the golf range … hehe
  
  Reply Report comment
Jeffrey

Jul 3, 2013 at 4:22 pm

Look, I didn’t throw my R1, it slipped.

Reply Report comment
- Corey
  
  Jul 3, 2013 at 4:30 pm
  
  The Crazy Person to Romeo:
  
  Look, you’re the Mexican Mac O’Grady. You need to figure out why I’m still shanking the ball.
  
  Reply Report comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Opinion & Analysis

5 Things We Learned: Thursday at the PGA Championship

Published

2 weeks ago

May 15, 2026

Ronald Montesano

Aronimink is not a storied club, but when Donald Ross himself proclaimed it to be as good as he can design and build, one had to take notice. Jay Sigel was the pre-eminent male amateur golfer from the mid-1970s to the mid-1990s. He might have called any number of Philadelphia clubs home, but he chose Aronimink. It served him well. Gary Player won a PGA Championship here in 1962, and was followed by the 1993 winner … nobody. Aronimink gave that event away to Inverness, for reasons of which it is certainly not proud. So be it. We had to wait sixty-four years for the PGA to return to Newtown Square, but here we are. Aronimink has been neo-restored by Gil Hanse and team, to return Ross features with an eye toward defense against the dark arts, errrr, high-tech equipment.

Day one saw Rory McIlroy and Bryson DeChambeau dig big holes, to the tune of plus-four and plus-six, respectively. Since the first-round lead will be minus-three at worst, many shots will need to be made up for the power couple to reach contention. By nightfall, seven golfers held the day-one lead at three-under par 67. Shots and sticks caught our attention, and we are proud to present Five Things We Learned on Tech Thursday at the 2026 PGA Championship. Thanks to InsideTourGolfer, Today’s Golfer, and GolfWRX for initial equipment research.

First, meet Min Woo Lee

Min Woo Lee, aka Dr. Chipinski, has once again thrust himself into the conversation of Can he, will he, when will he? Lee has so much talent, wins not nearly as often as we believe that he should, and has no major near-misses (much less titles) on his wiki. The young Aussie is getting older and wiser, but is he able to avoid the scarring that holds the older and wiser back from breaking through? Philadelphia offers another opportunity. Min Woo signed for five birdies and two bogeys on day one, and grabbed a share of the opening-day lead at Aronimink. Winners transcend history and the moment, and Lee will need that sort of ascent to lift the Wannamaker on Sunday.

Second, meet Aldrich Potgeiter

The young South African golfer can rip driver with the best of them. Aronimink tips out at nearly 7400 yards, but beyond the fairway bunkers that ensnare only the mortals, Potgeiter can take his chances with wedge from the rough. On Thursday, he spent plenty of time in the spinach. Like Popeye, he used his muscles to gouge and thrash and dig his way out. Six birdies against three bogeys on the card brought AP in a three deep.

Third, meet Martin Kaymer

Not a major event takes place without a where’s he been throwback moment. We know that Martin Kaymer left the PGA and DP World tours for LIV golf, but the two-time (US Open and PGA) major winner has a lifetime exemption into at least one major event, and he seizes the opportunity each May. Kaymer joined the six-seven brigade with four birdies and a solitary bogey on day one. Kaymer was never a long hitter, and the years are kind to no golfer. The German champion will need to uncork every bottle of guile and strategy in his cabinet to remain in contention. For today, though, he occupies a rung on the ladder of Tour Tech.

Fourth, meet Scottie Scheffler

Let’s see, he’s the defending champion at the PGA, and he found his way back to the top tier with five birdies against two bogeys. To be a favorite and then play up to that stature and expectation is quite difficult. Just ask Rory, Bryson, and some of the other pre-tournament heartthrobs. Scheffler’s game is complete, and to knock him off the OWGR #1 pedestal, one needs to defeat him at the majors. Aronimink is the sort of course that fits Scheffler’s game. Better yet, it unfits the game of many of his challengers. Don’t expect Scheffler to go away anytime soon. Come Sunday, he’ll be around.

Fifth, meet Stephan Jaeger

Clocking in for the unheralded players shift are Ryo Hisatsune and Stephan Jaeger. Hisatsune logged seven birdies on day one, but gave most of them back with four bogeys. Still, he’s tied at the top for a time. Jaeger pitched five birdies against two bogeys, including a run of three consecutive, from holes four through six. Odds are that one of the two will hang around through 36 holes. Odds also suggest that both will be gone by Saturday evening. Still, the PGA Championship has historically been the major most likely to be won by an under-known. Both Hisatsune and Jaeger feature on that list, so good luck, lads!

Club Junkie

Club Junkie’s Titleist GTS driver fitting results!

Published

2 weeks ago

May 14, 2026

Brian Knudson

On this episode of the Club Junkie Podcast, I head to the Titleist Performance Institute for a full driver fitting with the new Titleist GTS lineup. We dive into the fitting process, talk about what made the biggest difference in performance, and break down how the different GTS heads and shaft combinations compare on the launch monitor. If you are thinking about a new driver setup for this season, there is a lot to take away from this one.

I also get into Brooks Koepka and the gear setup he brought to the PGA Championship, including the putters that caught my eye during the week. There are some interesting equipment trends showing up at the highest level right now and we break down what stands out.

To wrap things up, I talk about reshafting a few wedges, what I learned during the process, and swapping an adaptor onto a new shaft for another build project in the shop. A gear packed episode from start to finish for anyone who loves golf equipment and club building.

Follow Club Junkie everywhere:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/clubjunkiepod/
X: https://x.com/ClubJunkiePod
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@clubjunkiepod
Threads: https://www.threads.com/@clubjunkiepod

Club Junkie

Club Junkie WITB, week 16: New Titleist GTS woods!

Published

2 weeks ago

May 14, 2026

Brian Knudson

Excited for this week’s WITB as we get to add the new Titleist GTS woods to the bag! I was fit at Titleist’s TPI facility in Oceanside California a few weeks ago and my new clubs just showed up. I am also adding a cool set of irons that I built last year some wild custom wedges into a new golf bag. Speaking of the bag I have a new Ghost Anyday Black Ops stand bag that I will be using on my Motocaddy Remote M7 electric cart.

Driver: Titleist GTS3 (11 degrees @ 10.25)
Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Red 6s

3-wood: Titleist GT1 3Tour (14.5 degrees)
Shaft: Graphite Design Tour AD CQ-7s

5-wood: Titleist GTS (18 degrees)
Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Red 7s

9-wood: Titleist GT1 (24 degress)
Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Red 7s

Irons: Bettinardi CB24 (5-PW)
Shafts: KBS C-Taper Lite 110 stiff

Wedge: TaylorMade MG5 (50-09 SB)
Shaft: Mitsubishi MMT 125 Stiff

Wedge: TaylorMade MG5 (56-12 SB)
Shaft: Mitsubishi MMT 125 Stiff

Wedge: TaylorMade MG5 (60-08 LB)
Shaft: Mitsubishi MMT 125 Stiff

Putter: Dan Carraher ZT Proto

Ball: Callaway Chrome Tour

Bag: Ghost Anyday Black Ops Stand Bag