Opinion & Analysis
Swanson: The 8 Worst “What’s In The Bag” Mistakes Golfers Can Make
Warning: Swanson, the author of this story, does not exist… except in his writing. His character is completely imagined, but that doesn’t mean his opinions aren’t real.
—
I can’t stand playing golf with other people. It’s not that I’m anti-social or anything, it’s just that 99 percent of you have no idea what you’re doing, and it reflects poorly on me.
For instance, one time I played golf with the president of Ecuador because he brought me in to consult on the bunkering of his new course at the base of the Andean foothills. Upon arriving, I stuck to my usual routine at a new golf course, and asked what the course record was. It was 66; I was already licking my chops.
So we’re on the 8th hole, and I stuck it to 3 feet with a nice uphill birdie putt to get to 4-under par (I would have tapped it in immediately but the ball had plugged in its own ball mark… high-ball hitter problems). The president was just off the green, and he hit a decent chip shot that was going too fast, but nailed the pin and dropped in the hole. Being the courteous playing partner I am, I grabbed his ball from the hole so he didn’t have to bend down… and so I could hurry up and tap in my birdie. As soon as I touched the ball, however, I knew we had a problem. I felt Surlyn and an odd dimple pattern. My worst fear was realized; he was playing with a budget golf ball.
I threw the golf ball back in his direction, but threw it as far as I could, and it ended up in a pond beside another green. Long story short, I’m no longer welcome in Ecuador because I “disrespected” the president, even though he was the one being disrespectful by not using a premium golf ball. One less course record to my name*, but hey, new courses get built everyday.
Point is, don’t play golf if you don’t know what you’re doing out there. And the first way to ensure you don’t get laughed off the golf course is to have a respectable equipment setup. Here’s what to avoid in your “What’s In The Bag” so as not to look like a fool.
*Editors Note: Swanson currently holds zero official course records to date.
Adjustable Driver
You know who adjustable drivers are for? People who don’t know what lead tape is. And do you know who lead tape is for? People who don’t know what hot melt is. Hot melt was invented for a reason; to make driver heads feel like butter, and to give golfers the ultimate control over swing weight and CG.
Insider tip: I put hot melt on the outside soles of my golf cleats to help my pressure trace throughout the swing.
Hybrids/Rescue Clubs
I briefly touched on this in my first article on GolfWRX, but nothing says “I have no control over my golf ball” like bagging a hybrid. Personally, I don’t play fairway woods either, but I recognize that hitting a 1-iron is more difficult than I make it look, so woods could be necessary for some.
And while I understand hybrids have a positive affect when it comes to growing the game — giving less-skilled players a chance to enjoy the sport — I have no idea why a serious golfer would admit he needs to be “rescued.” I mean, I didn’t see Michael Phelps wearing pool floaties on his arms during the Olympics, did you?
Cavity Back Irons
If you haven’t learned your lesson from Jordan Spieth by now, you may be a lost cause.
But check this out: The hardest golf course on the U.S. Open docket is Oakmont. Dustin Johnson won the U.S. Open at Oakmont. What type of irons was he using? You guessed it: blades.
Imagine if a barber used a cavity-back instead of a blade to shape up your fresh hair cut. Personally, I demand precision in my golf game, and in my shave.
Cast Wedges
I audibly gasp every time I look into a golfer’s bag and see a cast wedge.
Chipping and pitching requires feel, right? So why would anyone voluntarily choose a wedge that provides zero feel and even worse performance. Wasn’t the forging process invented so golfers could hit flop shots and low spinners with tremendous control and feedback? And feedback is infinitely more important than getting the shot up and down.
Stock Shafts
If I ask you what shaft you play in your driver and your answer is, “I’m not sure, whatever it came with,” then we don’t belong on the same golf course. If you don’t think what shaft you play matters, then you probably order tap water at restaurants instead of sparkling.
A Bag Tag from a Public Course
I saw a guy just the other week who touted bag tags from Whistling Straits and TPC Sawgrass. I thought to myself, this gentleman must be so embarrassed. So I asked him about it, and he was actually proud that he had played those courses, carrying around the bag tags like trophies.
Um, they’re public courses. That’s not something to be proud of.
I actually set the course record at Pubble Beach (Pebble + Public = Pubble) one time. We had an afternoon tee time at Cypress, so we figured we’d get in some warm-up holes at Pubble. The greens were terribly bumpy and the rough was spotty at best, but I managed to get around in 59. They wanted me to enter my card to the clubhouse and engrave my name on a plaque. No thanks; not at a public course am I advertising my name.
Double Straps
If you have a bag with double straps, I know you’re either:
- Not very good at golf since you don’t have a staff bag, or
- You’ve never heard of a caddie, in which case you’re probably not very good at golf.
Non-Milled Putter
Remember when scientists discovered that titanium drivers flew farther than persimmon, and people stopped using persimmon because they have brains? Same with milled putters. It’s a scientific fact that milled putters are more precise than other putters. So if you have a putter that’s not milled, I’ll play you for whatever money you want to put up.
To see what the pros do, visit GolfWRX’s WITB Page.
As the editor-in-chief of this website and an observer of the GolfWRX forums and other online golf equipment discourse for over a decade, I’m pretty well attuned to the grunts and grumbles of a significant portion of the golf equipment purchasing spectrum. And before you accuse me of lording above all in some digital ivory tower, I’d like to offer that I worked at golf courses (public and private) for years prior to picking up my pen, so I’m well-versed in the non-degenerate golf equipment consumers out there. I touched (green)grass (retail)!
Complaints about the ills of and related to the OEMs usually follow some version of: Product cycles are too short for real innovation, tour equipment isn’t the same as retail (which is largely not true, by the way), too much is invested in marketing and not enough in R&D, top staffer X hasn’t even put the new driver in play, so it’s obviously not superior to the previous generation, prices are too high, and on and on.
Without digging into the merits of any of these claims, which I believe are mostly red herrings, I’d like to bring into view of our rangefinder what I believe to be the two primary difficulties golf equipment companies face.
One: As Terry Koehler, back when he was the CEO of Ben Hogan, told me at the time of the Ft Worth irons launch, if you can’t regularly hit the golf ball in a coin-sized area in the middle of the face, there’s not a ton that iron technology can do for you. Now, this is less true now with respect to irons than when he said it, and is less and less true by degrees as the clubs get larger (utilities, fairways, hybrids, drivers), but there remains a great deal of golf equipment truth in that statement. Think about it — which is to say, in TL;DR fashion, get lessons from a qualified instructor who will teach you about the fundamentals of repeatable impact and how the golf swing works, not just offer band-aid fixes. If you can’t repeatably deliver the golf club to the golf ball in something resembling the manner it was designed for, how can you expect to be getting the most out of the club — put another way, the maximum value from your investment?
Similarly, game improvement equipment can only improve your game if you game it. In other words, get fit for the clubs you ought to be playing rather than filling the bag with the ones you wish you could hit or used to be able to hit. Of course, don’t do this if you don’t care about performance and just want to hit a forged blade while playing off an 18 handicap. That’s absolutely fine. There were plenty of members in clubs back in the day playing Hogan Apex or Mizuno MP-32 irons who had no business doing so from a ballstriking standpoint, but they enjoyed their look, feel, and complementary qualities to their Gatsby hats and cashmere sweaters. Do what brings you a measure of joy in this maddening game.
Now, the second issue. This is not a plea for non-conforming equipment; rather, it is a statement of fact. USGA/R&A limits on every facet of golf equipment are detrimental to golf equipment manufacturers. Sure, you know this, but do you think about it as it applies to almost every element of equipment? A 500cc driver would be inherently more forgiving than a 460cc, as one with a COR measurement in excess of 0.83. 50-inch shafts. Box grooves. And on and on.
Would fewer regulations be objectively bad for the game? Would this erode its soul? Fortunately, that’s beside the point of this exercise, which is merely to point out the facts. The fact, in this case, is that equipment restrictions and regulations are the slaughterbench of an abundance of innovation in the golf equipment space. Is this for the best? Well, now I’ve asked the question twice and might as well give a partial response, I guess my answer to that would be, “It depends on what type of golf you’re playing and who you’re playing it with.”
For my part, I don’t mind embarrassing myself with vintage blades and persimmons chasing after the quasi-spiritual elevation of a well-struck shot, but that’s just me. Plenty of folks don’t give a damn if their grooves are conforming. Plenty of folks think the folks in Liberty Corner ought to add a prison to the museum for such offences. And those are just a few of the considerations for the amateur game — which doesn’t get inside the gallery ropes of the pro game…
Different strokes in the game of golf, in my humble opinion.
Anyway, I believe equipment company engineers are genuinely trying to build better equipment year over year. The marketing departments are trying to find ways to make this equipment appeal to the broadest segment of the golf market possible. All of this against (1) the backdrop of — at least for now — firm product cycles. And golfers who, with their ~15 average handicap (men), for the most part, are not striping the golf ball like Tiger in his prime and seem to have less and less time year over year to practice and improve. (2) Regulations that massively restrict what they’re able to do…
That’s the landscape as I see it and the real headwinds for golf equipment companies. No doubt, there’s more I haven’t considered, but I think the previous is a better — and better faith — point of departure when formulating any serious commentary on the golf equipment world than some of the more cynical and conspiratorial takes I hear.
Agree? Disagree? Think I’m worthy of an Adam Hadwin-esque security guard tackle? Let me know in the comments.
@golfoncbs The infamous Adam Hadwin tackle ? #golf #fyp #canada #pgatour #adamhadwin ? Ghibli-style nostalgic waltz – MaSssuguMusic
Episode #16 brings us Cliff McKinney. Cliff is the founder of Old Charlie Golf Club, a new club, and concept, to be built in the Florida panhandle. The model is quite interesting and aims to make great, private golf more affordable. We hope you enjoy the show!
Last week, I came across a reel from BBC Sport on Instagram featuring Scottie Scheffler speaking to the media ahead of The Open at Royal Portrush. In it, he shared that he often wonders what the point is of wanting to win tournaments so badly — especially when he knows, deep down, that it doesn’t lead to a truly fulfilling life.
View this post on Instagram
“Is it great to be able to win tournaments and to accomplish the things I have in the game of golf? Yeah, it brings tears to my eyes just to think about it because I’ve literally worked my entire life to be good at this sport,” Scheffler said. “To have that kind of sense of accomplishment, I think, is a pretty cool feeling. To get to live out your dreams is very special, but at the end of the day, I’m not out here to inspire the next generation of golfers. I’m not out here to inspire someone to be the best player in the world, because what’s the point?”
Ironically — or perhaps perfectly — he went on to win the claret jug.
That question — what’s the point of winning? — cuts straight to the heart of the human journey.
As someone who’s spent over two decades in the trenches of professional golf, and in deep study of the mental, emotional, and spiritual dimensions of the game, I see Scottie’s inner conflict as a sign of soul evolution in motion.
I came to golf late. I wasn’t a junior standout or college All-American. At 27, I left a steady corporate job to see if I could be on the PGA Tour starting as a 14-handicap, average-length hitter. Over the years, my journey has been defined less by trophies and more by the relentless effort to navigate the deeply inequitable and gated system of professional golf — an effort that ultimately turned inward and helped me evolve as both a golfer and a person.
One perspective that helped me make sense of this inner dissonance around competition and our culture’s tendency to overvalue winning is the idea of soul evolution.
The University of Virginia’s Division of Perceptual Studies has done extensive research on reincarnation, and Netflix’s Surviving Death (Episode 6) explores the topic, too. Whether you take it literally or metaphorically, the idea that we’re on a long arc of growth — from beginner to sage elder — offers a profound perspective.
If you accept the premise literally, then terms like “young soul” and “old soul” start to hold meaning. However, even if we set the word “soul” aside, it’s easy to see that different levels of life experience produce different worldviews.
Newer souls — or people in earlier stages of their development — may be curious and kind but still lack discernment or depth. There is a naivety, and they don’t yet question as deeply, tending to see things in black and white, partly because certainty feels safer than confronting the unknown.
As we gain more experience, we begin to experiment. We test limits. We chase extreme external goals — sometimes at the expense of health, relationships, or inner peace — still operating from hunger, ambition, and the fragility of the ego.
It’s a necessary stage, but often a turbulent and unfulfilling one.
David Duval fell off the map after reaching World No. 1. Bubba Watson had his own “Is this it?” moment with his caddie, Ted Scott, after winning the Masters.
In Aaron Rodgers: Enigma, reflecting on his 2011 Super Bowl win, Rodgers said:
“Now I’ve accomplished the only thing that I really, really wanted to do in my life. Now what? I was like, ‘Did I aim at the wrong thing? Did I spend too much time thinking about stuff that ultimately doesn’t give you true happiness?’”
Jim Carrey once said, “I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.”
Eventually, though, something shifts.
We begin to see in shades of gray. Winning, dominating, accumulating—these pursuits lose their shine. The rewards feel more fleeting. Living in a constant state of fight-or-flight makes us feel alive, yes, but not happy and joyful.
Compassion begins to replace ambition. Love, presence, and gratitude become more fulfilling than status, profits, or trophies. We crave balance over burnout. Collaboration over competition. Meaning over metrics.
Interestingly, if we zoom out, we can apply this same model to nations and cultures. Countries, like people, have a collective “soul stage” made up of the individuals within them.
Take the United States, for example. I’d place it as a mid-level soul: highly competitive and deeply driven, but still learning emotional maturity. Still uncomfortable with nuance. Still believing that more is always better. Despite its global wins, the U.S. currently ranks just 23rd in happiness (as of 2025). You might liken it to a gifted teenager—bold, eager, and ambitious, but angsty and still figuring out how to live well and in balance. As much as a parent wants to protect their child, sometimes the child has to make their own mistakes to truly grow.
So when Scottie Scheffler wonders what the point of winning is, I don’t see someone losing strength.
I see someone evolving.
He’s beginning to look beyond the leaderboard. Beyond metrics of success that carry a lower vibration. And yet, in a poetic twist, Scheffler did go on to win The Open. But that only reinforces the point: even at the pinnacle, the question remains. And if more of us in the golf and sports world — and in U.S. culture at large — started asking similar questions, we might discover that the more meaningful trophy isn’t about accumulating or beating others at all costs.
It’s about awakening and evolving to something more than winning could ever promise.
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Ron
Oct 19, 2016 at 3:15 pm
This was funny. I’m not giving up my cavity backs, though. The sting that shivers up my arm when I hit my blades thin gave me tendinitis.
I still have the blades… Maybe someday I’ll be good enough to hit them again.
Keith B. Real
Sep 23, 2016 at 4:32 pm
These are funny!
Bee Bee Beehive
Sep 17, 2016 at 11:35 am
Dear GolfWRX writer,
You’re not a comedian. Don’t quit your day job.
Yours,
I wish I could have the last two minutes of my life back.
Mad-Mex
Sep 5, 2016 at 6:07 pm
Readers: The worst mistakes GolfWRX keeps making:
1) Attempt at humor
2) Unbiased club reviews
3) Attempt at humor
4) Unbiased club reviews
5) Attempt at humor
6) Honest club reviews
Mitchell-ish
Sep 2, 2016 at 10:52 am
Anyone who is saying that Swanson should not post are all the individuals who Swanson is making fun of in this article. They read all the posts of you jack-wagons waxing lyrical expertise on all things golf equipment when I would absolutely love to see your games, what equipment you buy, and what courses you play. HE is making fun of you. These articles are amazing because it identifies the egotistical hacks who think they actually know something when they aren’t even informed enough about the game of golf to understand satirical writing about the average golfer. This is the epitome of ironical! Swanson, whoever you are you masked avenger, keep exposing these trolls and self-congratulatory morons and making the rest of us laugh
Mad-Mex
Sep 5, 2016 at 6:07 pm
Uh,,, wipe your nose again, missed a spot.
Johan Klarin
Aug 30, 2016 at 3:14 pm
absolutely hilarious. keep it coming. thanks
Robert Darling
Aug 29, 2016 at 2:35 pm
I laughed a few times…..Thanks for this
Bobtrumpet
Aug 29, 2016 at 2:00 pm
“I can’t stand playing golf with other people. It’s not that I’m anti-social or anything, it’s just that 99 percent of you have no idea what you’re doing, and it reflects poorly on me.”
Not generally a Swanson fan, but I have to admit, that was damn funny!
Mike Honcho
Aug 29, 2016 at 1:41 pm
No double strap bang. Too fat and lazy to walk 9?
Justin
Aug 29, 2016 at 1:00 pm
Did you just create a new subcategory of writing? Egotistical satire?
To be honest, this being the first time I’ve read a Swanson article, I had no idea it was satire until about 1/3 of the way in. I thought someone actually existed that was this much of a jerk. Well, I’m sure a number of people exist who actually act like this, but I’m not sure how also don’t call themselves “politicians”
Mr. Wedge
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:50 pm
It’s funny how you get ridiculed for taking your game seriously these days (i.e. playing blades, using premium balls, optimizing your shaft (which IMO has way more of an impact to performance than blade vs. cavity)). Who cares? Some people get enjoyment out of this. They realize they’re not going pro.
Mike Honcho
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:35 pm
I actually thought I was going to have to handout this jack-hole a kudo for finally writing a good article. But then you get to the double strap, and BINGO, Swanson once again proves he’s an idiot: A) newsflash genius, plenty of double straps on PGA, LPGA, Euro tour staff bags. Next time I see a couple of tour caddies I know, I’ll tell them you think they are sissies. B) Easy to assume you’re a fat and/or lazy if you don’t have an old school Ping Hoofer in the garage that you use to walk a late Sunday 9. C) Thanks Judge Smails Jr. for letting us know that you only patron courses with caddies. Stay there, we don’t want you out with the common man.
Mr. Wedge
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:55 pm
Dude, you clearly missed point in that the entire article was satirical and meant the opposite. He IS representing himself as a common man and actually was poking fun at the golfers who HAVE single strap bags…
kolfpro
Aug 29, 2016 at 3:38 am
Love it!
Sometimes a Smizzle
Aug 28, 2016 at 11:15 am
So many shanks. What is the matter with you people?
Lou Loomis
Aug 28, 2016 at 6:48 pm
I understand why some people wouldn’t find these articles humorous. What I don’t understand is why they would still click on the link.
Dave Dudus
Aug 28, 2016 at 10:09 am
Sly humour in this article. I’d love forged wedges, but the Miura wedges are out of reach, which leaves the Mizuno, which I might try. Any other forged wedges out there?
Anthony
Aug 28, 2016 at 4:32 pm
Mizuno are the best production irons on the market, period. Yes, Miura are one of a kind, and aspirational. Check out the new JPX-900 line from Mizuno on September 4th.
Usman
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:07 pm
Ben Hogans!
Chris
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:45 pm
Fourteen.
Jeff
Aug 28, 2016 at 4:57 am
I like the editors note. As a fan of these articles, I’d like to note the hilarious potential of future editors notes debunking Swanson claims. Thanks
DeadFish
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:21 pm
Like #3? Find me a name brand wedge that isn’t cast… Love those Cleveland wedges? oh they’re cast….How about those Vokey wedges? Cast as well…Callaway wedges? Cast too! WTF, must be a miss print. Is it a miss print….Silence….
Johnnylongballz
Aug 28, 2016 at 2:10 am
These are my favorite articles on WRX. ……Pubble Beach. LOL
Highball hitter
Aug 28, 2016 at 12:58 am
Love that someone out there has the same problems.
Dude
Aug 28, 2016 at 12:06 am
Why is this article funny. All the things he said are true.
Bro
Aug 28, 2016 at 1:29 pm
I know right?
KK
Aug 27, 2016 at 11:16 pm
Any golfer who uses a mallet putter isn’t a real golfer and should be banned for life. Fact. BTW, ditto for anyone who’s ever golfed in jeans, regardless of course clothing policy. Actually, that odious bunch should be banned from this country.
Johnny Muscletown
Aug 27, 2016 at 8:55 pm
Is this pepperturbo?
Benny
Aug 27, 2016 at 6:50 pm
I thought this was hilarious. Well done Golfwrx, love it!
JR
Aug 27, 2016 at 6:08 pm
Swanson sounds like a first class hack to me!!
Timbleking
Aug 27, 2016 at 2:56 pm
Totally agree with you, Swanson.
I see so many people playing with a bag that barelly cost them around 5’000 bucks, while you can easily buy a set of Honma blades for twice that price? This is nonsense.
If you want to play decent golf, give yourself a chance to do it!
Deacon Blues
Aug 27, 2016 at 2:35 pm
Swanson needs to die a quick, but painful death.
Hen Man
Aug 27, 2016 at 2:07 pm
You need to post more on Twitter again!
BIG STU
Aug 27, 2016 at 1:15 pm
Too Funny! But I do like lead tape better than hot melt easier to apply at the range and take off if you screwed up and put on too much
ooffa
Aug 27, 2016 at 1:13 pm
I guess this is an attempt at humor. A failure, but an attempt. Swing and a miss!
ultimate hacker
Aug 27, 2016 at 2:05 pm
agreed… not humorous
Chris
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:47 pm
You’re the ultimate hacker, of course you wouldn’t find an article describing you hilarious.
Byron L
Aug 29, 2016 at 4:30 pm
swing and a miss, Alberstat style
Raj LP
Aug 27, 2016 at 1:07 pm
You forgot that the most important wedge is the 60 or 64. Inside 60 yds = Flop shots.
TyB
Aug 27, 2016 at 12:53 pm
48 shank votes?
Seems these articles fly over people’s heads higher than one of Swanson’s spectacular high balls.
ByT
Aug 27, 2016 at 6:32 pm
Yeah. Because it is an inredibly sophisticated brand of humour that mere mortals don’t understand.
Or, more likely it is just unfunny rubbish.
Lester Diamond
Aug 27, 2016 at 11:29 am
“And feedback is infinitely more important than getting the shot up and down.”
Absolutely spot-on. Even my hosel rockets are buttery smooth.
Hack Life
Aug 27, 2016 at 10:53 am
Please stop.
B. Parsons
Aug 29, 2016 at 12:55 pm
^Agreed.
End this fake author. Just end it please.