Opinion & Analysis
The Words Golfers Never Want to Hear
Since this story (and the future stories I will share) may not paint me in the best light, I decided to write under a pen name. Full disclosure: my employer also didn’t think it was cool that I would be writing for a golf website.
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My wife came to me other day and said the words you never want to hear from your spouse: “I think we should quit the country club.” The chain of events this set off inside my head was like nothing you can imagine. On second thought, you’re on GolfWRX, so you know exactly what went through my head. I’ll save all the details of conversation for another time, but for now I can tell you that I put on quite a show after she uttered those words.
The best way I can describe the next hour of my life is to compare it to how you act when your wife shuts down your request to play 18….the day after you just played 36. You know deep down you shouldn’t be asking to play again, but you give it a shot anyway. It sounds something like this: “Oh honey, I’ll cut the grass when I get home.” Or “How about after the round, I take you to that new restaurant you’ve been wanting to try?” Or “I know I played 36 today, but when I get back I’ll put a new roof on the house. Pleeeease.” We’ve all been there, and if you take that scenario and multiply it by 50, that’s where I was in my head.
At some point during this hour, I realized a couple of things. First, I realized golf is more than just a sport to me. It’s a way of life, something I love, and something I don’t want to give up. My day is constantly filled with thoughts of golf. The first thing I do when I get to work? I check out the GolfWRX Classifieds to see if anything interesting was posted since last night when I went to bed. Lunch break? I’ll check eBay for the golf-related items I’m watching. When I get home, I flip on the Golf Channel while I change out of my work clothes. It might not be healthy, but it’s my life, and like many of you, I’m OK with that.
The other thing I realized in that hour was that all of the people who have told me my life is like a sitcom were correct. I say this because, at one point, the thought crossed my mind to try to fake cry! At another point, I thought about making up a story about playing golf with my dad as a kid, the memories I had of it, blah blah blah. Somewhere in middle of all of that, I even contemplated acting as if I was having chest pains.
At the end of the day I didn’t do any of that. For the most part, I acted like an adult… sort of. To be clear, though, if you would have told me that any of those acts was a surefire way to end the conversation and keep my membership, I would have done it in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, I know my acting skills suck and my wife can see right through them.
Her reason for wanting to quit was valid; it costs a lot of money. I can’t argue with that, because it’s true. I belong to one of the nicer country clubs in the area, and the golf course is the crown jewel. It hosts local qualifiers, USGA events, etc. and it’s less than 5 minutes from my house. It has a great practice facility with a full range, three practice greens, and a short game area. The fact that it is less than 5 minutes from my house is the cherry on top. When my wife looks at the club, she sees it as something standing between her and our next home-improvement project. After plenty of back and forth, we agreed that if I wanted to keep our membership, I had to come up with a way to offset some of the costs of the club.
After the conversation, I went straight to where I do my best work… well, the second-best place, which is my man cave/basement. My objective was clear; I had to come up with a way to make some money on the side, and I had to come up with it fast before my wife changed her mind. I did what any of us would do in this situation; I decided to hit some putts for a half hour to clear my head, and then I got started.
Since I’m a 7-handicap, turning pro was out of the question. I thought I could be a golf writer, but the life of a journalist isn’t for me. Then it hit me…. the thing where everyone thinks my life is a sitcom. That led me to the brilliant idea to share these stories and hope that I can somehow use them to help me keep my membership. I’m open to other ideas (or donations) if you got them.
To be honest, I don’t think my stories are out of the ordinary, but my co-workers and friends constantly tell me they are. Like the time my club-championship match went into a five-hole playoff and my wife had to go to a party by herself is a pretty good one. Although the time I fell down the stairs while trying to sneak out of the house at 5 a.m. to play an early round is probably better.
The one my buddies enjoy is when I got caught putting fake calendar appointments in my wife’s phone that made us look busy on important days like Masters Sunday, the Ryder Cup, and my fantasy golf draft. To the say least, I have plenty of them, and her wanting to quit the club isn’t going away anytime soon. I’m sure that will lead to more. So I’m going to share all of the stories and see if it leads me to a way to keep my membership.
Wish me luck!
For feedback (or donations) please email me at j.ruggeri@yahoo.com. You can also follow me on Twitter at @Joey_Ruggeri.
Aronimink is not a storied club, but when Donald Ross himself proclaimed it to be as good as he can design and build, one had to take notice. Jay Sigel was the pre-eminent male amateur golfer from the mid-1970s to the mid-1990s. He might have called any number of Philadelphia clubs home, but he chose Aronimink. It served him well. Gary Player won a PGA Championship here in 1962, and was followed by the 1993 winner … nobody. Aronimink gave that event away to Inverness, for reasons of which it is certainly not proud. So be it. We had to wait sixty-four years for the PGA to return to Newtown Square, but here we are. Aronimink has been neo-restored by Gil Hanse and team, to return Ross features with an eye toward defense against the dark arts, errrr, high-tech equipment.
Day one saw Rory McIlroy and Bryson DeChambeau dig big holes, to the tune of plus-four and plus-six, respectively. Since the first-round lead will be minus-three at worst, many shots will need to be made up for the power couple to reach contention. By nightfall, seven golfers held the day-one lead at three-under par 67. Shots and sticks caught our attention, and we are proud to present Five Things We Learned on Tech Thursday at the 2026 PGA Championship. Thanks to InsideTourGolfer, Today’s Golfer, and GolfWRX for initial equipment research.
First, meet Min Woo Lee
Min Woo Lee, aka Dr. Chipinski, has once again thrust himself into the conversation of Can he, will he, when will he? Lee has so much talent, wins not nearly as often as we believe that he should, and has no major near-misses (much less titles) on his wiki. The young Aussie is getting older and wiser, but is he able to avoid the scarring that holds the older and wiser back from breaking through? Philadelphia offers another opportunity. Min Woo signed for five birdies and two bogeys on day one, and grabbed a share of the opening-day lead at Aronimink. Winners transcend history and the moment, and Lee will need that sort of ascent to lift the Wannamaker on Sunday.
Second, meet Aldrich Potgeiter
The young South African golfer can rip driver with the best of them. Aronimink tips out at nearly 7400 yards, but beyond the fairway bunkers that ensnare only the mortals, Potgeiter can take his chances with wedge from the rough. On Thursday, he spent plenty of time in the spinach. Like Popeye, he used his muscles to gouge and thrash and dig his way out. Six birdies against three bogeys on the card brought AP in a three deep.
Third, meet Martin Kaymer
Not a major event takes place without a where’s he been throwback moment. We know that Martin Kaymer left the PGA and DP World tours for LIV golf, but the two-time (US Open and PGA) major winner has a lifetime exemption into at least one major event, and he seizes the opportunity each May. Kaymer joined the six-seven brigade with four birdies and a solitary bogey on day one. Kaymer was never a long hitter, and the years are kind to no golfer. The German champion will need to uncork every bottle of guile and strategy in his cabinet to remain in contention. For today, though, he occupies a rung on the ladder of Tour Tech.
Fourth, meet Scottie Scheffler
Let’s see, he’s the defending champion at the PGA, and he found his way back to the top tier with five birdies against two bogeys. To be a favorite and then play up to that stature and expectation is quite difficult. Just ask Rory, Bryson, and some of the other pre-tournament heartthrobs. Scheffler’s game is complete, and to knock him off the OWGR #1 pedestal, one needs to defeat him at the majors. Aronimink is the sort of course that fits Scheffler’s game. Better yet, it unfits the game of many of his challengers. Don’t expect Scheffler to go away anytime soon. Come Sunday, he’ll be around.
Fifth, meet Stephan Jaeger
Clocking in for the unheralded players shift are Ryo Hisatsune and Stephan Jaeger. Hisatsune logged seven birdies on day one, but gave most of them back with four bogeys. Still, he’s tied at the top for a time. Jaeger pitched five birdies against two bogeys, including a run of three consecutive, from holes four through six. Odds are that one of the two will hang around through 36 holes. Odds also suggest that both will be gone by Saturday evening. Still, the PGA Championship has historically been the major most likely to be won by an under-known. Both Hisatsune and Jaeger feature on that list, so good luck, lads!
On this episode of the Club Junkie Podcast, I head to the Titleist Performance Institute for a full driver fitting with the new Titleist GTS lineup. We dive into the fitting process, talk about what made the biggest difference in performance, and break down how the different GTS heads and shaft combinations compare on the launch monitor. If you are thinking about a new driver setup for this season, there is a lot to take away from this one.
I also get into Brooks Koepka and the gear setup he brought to the PGA Championship, including the putters that caught my eye during the week. There are some interesting equipment trends showing up at the highest level right now and we break down what stands out.
To wrap things up, I talk about reshafting a few wedges, what I learned during the process, and swapping an adaptor onto a new shaft for another build project in the shop. A gear packed episode from start to finish for anyone who loves golf equipment and club building.
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Excited for this week’s WITB as we get to add the new Titleist GTS woods to the bag! I was fit at Titleist’s TPI facility in Oceanside California a few weeks ago and my new clubs just showed up. I am also adding a cool set of irons that I built last year some wild custom wedges into a new golf bag. Speaking of the bag I have a new Ghost Anyday Black Ops stand bag that I will be using on my Motocaddy Remote M7 electric cart.
Driver: Titleist GTS3 (11 degrees @ 10.25)
Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Red 6s
3-wood: Titleist GT1 3Tour (14.5 degrees)
Shaft: Graphite Design Tour AD CQ-7s
5-wood: Titleist GTS (18 degrees)
Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Red 7s
9-wood: Titleist GT1 (24 degress)
Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Red 7s
Irons: Bettinardi CB24 (5-PW)
Shafts: KBS C-Taper Lite 110 stiff
Wedge: TaylorMade MG5 (50-09 SB)
Shaft: Mitsubishi MMT 125 Stiff
Wedge: TaylorMade MG5 (56-12 SB)
Shaft: Mitsubishi MMT 125 Stiff
Wedge: TaylorMade MG5 (60-08 LB)
Shaft: Mitsubishi MMT 125 Stiff
Putter: Dan Carraher ZT Proto
Ball: Callaway Chrome Tour
Bag: Ghost Anyday Black Ops Stand Bag
Justin Rose WITB 2026 (April): Full WITB breakdown with new McLaren irons
RBC Heritage Tour Report: More minis, course-specific setups, Spider & GTS launches
What’s the story behind Webb Simpson’s custom-stamped irons?
Cadillac Championship Tour Report: Spieth’s sizable changes, McLaren Golf launches, and more
Kristoffer Reitan’s winning WITB: 2026 Truist Championship
Cameron Young’s winning WITB: 2026 Cadillac Championship
Aaron Rai’s winning WITB: 2026 PGA Championship
Nelly Korda WITB 2026 (April)
Justin Rose on the switch to McLaren Golf, learnings from previous equipment moves
Photos from the 2026 PGA Championship
Patrick Reed WITB 2026 (May)
Driver: Titleist GT3 (9 degrees) Buy here. Shaft: Aldila Rogue Silver 130 M.S.I. 70 TX 3-wood: TaylorMade Qi35 (15 degrees)...
Aaron Rai’s winning WITB: 2026 PGA Championship
Driver: TaylorMade M6 (9 degrees) Shaft: Aldilda Synergy Blue 70 TX 3-wood: TaylorMade Qi10 (15 degrees) Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Blue...
Michael Block WITB 2026 (May)
Driver: TaylorMade Qi4D (9 degrees) Shaft: Fujikura Ventus Black VeloCore+ 5 X 3-wood: TaylorMade Qi4D (15 degrees @14.25) Shaft: Mitsubishi...
Bryson DeChambeau WITB 2026 (May)
Driver: Krank Formula Fire Pro (6 degrees) Shaft: Project X Prototype 3-wood: Krank Formula Fire (10 degrees) Shaft: LA Golf BAD...
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nobody2u
Oct 30, 2017 at 2:35 am
What man would rather not want to spend more time at home. He gets a fresh list of honey do’s and told how bad of a husband he has been for spending time with friends that applaud good shots are not so cynical when you light a cigar or open a beer. If you do that at home and her mother should suddenly drop in, what a lovely time that is. Then you have all of the stuff on TV that you are getting to miss when you could be spending the afternoon with the understanding laughing friends and cart girls or the cute waitresses in the 19th hole that are willing to get whatever you want at your little hearts desire. I don’t know what man would give up that comradery among friends to be able to spend some quality time with the unpleasant person at home. Give her a little boost to either spend some time at the pool, you can charge drinks or other things at the pool, or send her shopping, she has a million options and yours should not be impeded.
Lance
Oct 20, 2017 at 4:22 pm
Currently, I’m entertaining a golf widow/model/trophy wife while old hubby is obsessed with his golf handicap and spends his days on the course and nights in the clubhouse.
My club also has tennis courts and I met her playing tennis and it started from then. She’s so happy now. Me too.
Da Judge
Oct 22, 2017 at 9:55 pm
Wife: “Golf course or inter course…. choose!”
Hubby: “Uuuum ….. “
Travis
Oct 19, 2017 at 9:09 am
I stopped reading this in the very beginning when you talked about “asking for permission” to go play golf… how about you get into a relationship where you two respect what each other wants to do.
I’ve never once had to “ask permission” to go play golf, nor does she ever “ask permission” to do her hobbies. We respect that those hobbies are each others’ passions, and that’s that.
Do you also “ask permission” to sleep in the bed again and not the couch in the living room? Pathetic.
nobody2u
Oct 18, 2017 at 4:40 pm
Your bragging about adultery, I don’t know if you are religious or Catholic, but, condemning yourself to the crimes of the flesh, you may want to re think at what you think is funny. I am not a Holy person but I promise you if I came in my home and found you trying to get out the window, you better be ready to have that thing you spent the last few seconds with to land on top of your point little head. See many of those golf widows don’t walk away with everything the man has worked his whole life for, so you may be acquiring a sweat little thing in your endeavors. And yes that is from experience, still glad that little fella did me such a great favor, I got the house and the kids, guess whats she’s doing,,, but not with me.
Lance
Oct 20, 2017 at 4:13 pm
Bitter bitter golf dude…. and fyi, all the golf widows come to my pad to get what they don’t get from their golfing hubby who prefers to spend time with his equally impotent buddies on the golf course.
A neglected woman will seek loving companionship wherever she can find it…. and they find me … and there are so many of them. Once a couple of them came to me for ……. you know.
Bob
Oct 18, 2017 at 11:57 am
A simple divorce should cure your problems
Barry
Oct 18, 2017 at 4:46 pm
Only if you’ve been smart enough to hide your assets from your wife
Busty McBoob
Oct 18, 2017 at 10:55 am
I still don’t get the reasons for marriage other than we’re trained from a very young age that marriage is just something you’re supposed to do in life. All my married friends bitch and moan about all the time about their wives not ‘letting them’ do stuff. Man up, take your (non golf) balls back and tell her you’re not quitting the country club.
Lance
Oct 19, 2017 at 12:15 pm
Such man golfers are perpetual children seeking pleasure on the golf course… while I get pleasure from their golf widows.
Eldrick T
Oct 18, 2017 at 3:38 am
I thought I was at a country club in California but somehow I ended up in a ditch in armpit Florida
Eldrick T
Oct 18, 2017 at 3:37 am
There was only one fire hydrant outside my house
Ben Jones
Oct 17, 2017 at 11:07 pm
My wife loved the country club. Man I miss those days! Camelot, yes it was. Then we had to move to somewhere where the courses are semi-private. What does that mean? It means crowded course, lousy tee times, and a chopped up practice area. Worst of all, the range balls are dead and the practice bunker is in the shank zone. Man, I miss that time.
8thehardway
Oct 17, 2017 at 5:04 pm
I wrote on this subject a decade ago and will share my still-valid observations.
Share your heartfelt disclosures with your wife and suggest marriage counseling. The USGA secretly maintains a list of marriage counselors, attorneys and judges ranked by handicap and Country Club affiliation so you will probably find a sympathetic ear in your neighborhood… just mention my user name.
If things don’t go well buy a home in Myrtle Beach and move divorce proceedings there… all decisions invariably favor the golfer and that includes custodial issues; be sure to mention how much you’ll save employing your children as caddies rather than paying those outrageous cart fees.
If you insist on staying domiciled in your present location and your wife isn’t employed, suggest the virtues of being a cart girl… the extra income, the opportunity to see more of you on weekends, saving money on mid-round snacks and how she can gather valuable information on whose new equipment purchases aren’t working out (handy to know for wagers or inexpensive purchases).
Above all, maintain your handicap and a positive outlook… women come and go but golf courses tend to linger.
Lance
Oct 19, 2017 at 12:13 pm
I feast on golf widows….. and they feast on me!
MS
Oct 17, 2017 at 1:36 pm
Donation… Sorry ain’t goint to happen. Not a member of a private club, never have been, probably never will be. Best I can do is season pass as a public course.
Milo
Oct 17, 2017 at 12:59 pm
1st world problems
AJ
Oct 17, 2017 at 12:56 am
keep the club but she will be gone. Shes giving you an out take it from experience
Lance
Oct 18, 2017 at 12:20 pm
Golf widows are primed for nookie. I know.
Judge Smeills
Oct 16, 2017 at 5:53 pm
Its not about the money, she just mentioned money because its better than saying that she hates golf and the amount of time you spend playing.
Lance
Oct 20, 2017 at 4:16 pm
Golf widows that I know well never complain about the time hubby spends at the country club …. and in fact encourages him to go play with the boys….. and then there’s me waiting and not for long ….lol
Bullsfan
Oct 16, 2017 at 4:31 pm
Been there and done that. Where did it get me, Divorced and on the hook for 20yrs. I get where you are coming from, I too am a lifelong golfer who has played collegiately and come from a long line of family golfers. It’s not a hobby, it truly is a life. I may not play or run a country club as my main source of employment, but for me and my family it’s the same. I was a member for 11 years at one of the most prestigious courses in my area, only 250 members and most had the money to buy 3rd world countries. So when the time came, 2007-08, in the middle of the downturn I had to give up my membership. Now other things happened personally and professionally that led to my divorce, but not being a member at my club anymore didn’t help my issues. Life hit hard and I had to reevaluate my life and what was important. Now today I have rebounded well, gainfully employed in my chosen field and remarried happily and fittingly enough live in a new home right across the street from a country club my parents were members at when I was growing up, but I haven’t joined! Would I like too, sure, but my lessons learned from my past is, it’s not the right time. I still play golf once, twice a week. I have friends all over my area who are either members or work at various clubs that I play with and for those times I’m not playing with them I pay my $30 and head out somewhere else and get my fix. What I’m saying is it’s not all that bad not having a membership. Would it be nice, sure. But there are other ways to play and enjoy tournaments and competition. You may want to look into these before your better half decides to do it for you.
sanjay
Oct 16, 2017 at 8:01 pm
$30?? A muni is not a country club….
CrashTestDummy
Oct 17, 2017 at 2:21 am
I have played a lot at both country clubs and public golf courses. Generally the shape of courses at country clubs are in better shape (especially the greens and bunkers). However, many public tracks are just as good if not better tracks that country clubs. You can still play good courses for 30-50 bucks in my area and really good courses for 60-80 bucks. Only a few are munis. Munis are not bad if the greens are decent and a decent track. You still have to hit good shots and play golf.
Steve
Oct 16, 2017 at 3:55 pm
Divorce her before you have children and you’re on her hook for 20 years.
Mower
Oct 16, 2017 at 7:24 pm
lol Ooooh, the dreaded ‘hook’.
Acemandrake
Oct 16, 2017 at 3:35 pm
“We already have three.”
sanjay
Oct 16, 2017 at 3:23 pm
Methinks you are misreading your wife’s suggestion to quit the country club. Perhaps her motives are justifiably selfish.
When she says: “I think we should quit the country club.”….. she may be telling you she wants you to spend more quality time with her than with your buddies, playing 36 holes and then coming home and telling her “I’m too tired for that… maybe tomorrow.”
The problem is that within most adult men there is a child who wants to play, for the pleasure… and with other men. Your fine wife is sending you a signal that everything is not fine with her because you want to play games rather than tending to her needs. Ya think…?!!
Mower
Oct 16, 2017 at 7:28 pm
Yep. It’s psychological jiu-jitsu. They’re trained from a very young age.
Frank Gifford
Oct 17, 2017 at 8:02 am
^^^^ Best comment so far!!
Boobsy McKiss
Oct 18, 2017 at 10:49 am
So true
Lance
Oct 18, 2017 at 12:16 pm
I search out such golf widows and they are starved for companionship. Me like ….
ray arcade
Oct 16, 2017 at 3:20 pm
And here I always thought it was “…you’re still away”.
sanjay
Oct 16, 2017 at 3:27 pm
Nice…. but women become gregarious when ignored and neglected for too long. In that case “…you’re still away” may be her opportunity to find pleasant companionship.
AW
Oct 16, 2017 at 5:04 pm
Maybe that’s the best solution if he can keep the membership. 🙂
sanjay
Oct 16, 2017 at 7:59 pm
Men who eschew sex for golf are …. well, you know…. the majority ….!
Lance
Oct 18, 2017 at 12:18 pm
Yup, I’ve had ‘companionship’ with many a golf widow.